From the mouths of babes

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Posted by Jamon Abercrombie | Posted in Generally Speaking | Posted on 25-01-2007

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A little boy was overheard praying:
“Lord, if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a real good time like I am.”

After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, “That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys.”

A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”

One bright little girl replied, “Because people are sleeping.”

Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother, Joel, were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. “You’re not supposed to talk out loud in church.”

“Why? Who’s going to stop me?” Joel asked.

Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, “See those two men standing by the door? They’re hushers.”

My favorite b/c I could see my boys pulling this one:

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. “If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, ‘Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.’

Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, “Ryan, you be Jesus!”

At a dinner party, the hostess turned to the guests’ six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?”

“I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied.

“Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the hostess answered.

The daughter bowed her head and said, “Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”

Shopping Atmosphere

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Posted by Jamon Abercrombie | Posted in Generally Speaking | Posted on 08-01-2007

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The supermarket near my house recently added all sorts of gadgets to make shopping more interesting.

It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.

When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and notice the scent of fresh hay.

When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.

The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn.

I don’t buy toilet paper there any more.

A Preschool Christmas

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Posted by Jamon Abercrombie | Posted in show stops | Posted on 04-01-2007

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